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Thursday, July 7, 2011

Reason enough to ride the subway

Besides being a cesspool of inefficiency, ugliness, laziness, and dirtiness - I have still found some redemptive qualities to the TTC. Mock surprise. Being also my only other ''cheap'' form of transportation (save from bumming a ride off friends) I  have no other alternative but to see the ''good side'' to the sad metro system called ''The Better Way''. Having also commuted away 4 hours of my life everyday for the last few months I think I have fair say in this. Case in point:
Can't say TTC has ever had cause for putting up a sign like this. Then again.

Exhibit A: Man picking nose
We've all been there but its still curiously fascinating to witness individuals who pretend like no one notices. This time this guy starting off looking like he was scratching an itch around the inside of his nostril. And then just a bit further. And no. Yes he did. Stuck his entire finger up there for all the world to see. Stayed this way for a good few seconds too for good measure.

Exhibit B: Senile women with weird foot protection quirk
Sat opposite a women who had this quirk that everytime before someone walked past her she'd bend down and touch the tips of her finger to the tip of her shoe - as if to protect them from being crushed. She did this EVERYTIME someone would pass by. At least she was consistent.

Exhibit C: Verbally abusive well-endowed female in strapless dress
Maybe cup D. Holding up what seemed to be a strapless maxi skirt.  And yes her chest was quite..substantial. Apparently some women was looking at her the wrong way and this ample-chested women started calling this other women every derogatory term in the book and then some new ones. I learned alot of new words that day.

Exhibit D: Spoiled entitled Yorkville-wannabe
You know the type. Those skeletons who can afford to sashay around with a $2000 Prada bag in her Manolos but somehow can't manage to afford more than a subway ride. Or maybe she's just slumming it for the fun of it. How nice. Miss Rich Bags decides that she's too high to actually ASK me if the seat beside me is occupied but instead taps away at my bag. Yes. Please do because I'm not a person and if you tap my bag Ill just automatically move it for you. If I could earn easy money by just tapping it I would. But you can't. Its called reality.